Children's birthday parties and invitations in Spain

Terms used

• Confirmar asistencia — Confirmar asistencia means 'confirm attendance': the host asks you to reply and say whether your child will come.
• Chuches — Chuches are sweets, such as gummies and candy, usually put in party bags.
• Bolsa de chuches — A bolsa de chuches is the party bag the host gives each guest when leaving, also called bolsa de cumple or detalle.
• Local de comunidad — A local de comunidad is a shared room in an apartment block that residents can use for parties.

Key rules

• Whole class: For nursery and early primary, invite the whole class, or at least a whole group of it, so nobody is left out.
• Reply: Answer the invitation a few days before the party so the host can tell the venue the numbers.
• Party bag: As host, give every child a small party bag when they leave.
• Allergies: Say about any allergy when you confirm, and how serious it is.

The short version

In Spain, parties for school-age children usually include the whole class. Guests bring a modest wrapped gift, and the host gives every child a small party bag when they leave. Reply to the invitation, and tell the host about any allergy.

Who gets invited

In nursery and early primary school, the norm is to invite the whole class, often 15 to 25 children, so nobody is left out. Inviting only the girls or only the boys is accepted as a way to keep numbers down. From about age 8 to 10, a few close friends only is increasingly common. Parties for children under 3 are usually family-centred, with relatives and a few friends.

Class size and school culture vary. Ask other parents or the class WhatsApp group what is usual.

Invitations and replies

Invitations usually go out 1 to 3 weeks before the party. They often arrive as an image or message in the class parents' WhatsApp group, or directly to you. Some come as a printed card handed out at school or at pick-up. Some schools ask parents not to hand out paper invitations in class unless the whole class is invited, so check first.

A reply is expected. Many invitations say "confirmar asistencia" with a phone number, or ask for a WhatsApp answer a few days before the party. The host needs the headcount for the venue and the food. Not replying is common, but it is seen as inconsiderate.

To decline, send a short message: "Gracias por la invitación, pero no podremos ir. ¡Que lo paséis genial!" A small gift or card is optional.

Gifts

Bring a wrapped gift costing 10 to 20 euros. Toys, games, books, craft kits and clothes are typical. Spend a little more for a close friend. In some classes parents pool money for one larger gift, or the family asks for a gift list through WhatsApp to avoid duplicates. Gifts are often opened at the party, in front of the guests.

Hosting: venues, food and party bags

Common venues are indoor play centres (parques de bolas), fast-food restaurants, party rooms (salones de celebraciones), your home, a park, or the community room (local de comunidad) in an apartment block. Play-centre packages usually include snacks, drinks, cake and an entertainer, and typically cost about 10 to 20 euros per child. Restaurants and extra entertainers cost more, and prices are higher in Madrid and Barcelona. Home and park parties are cheaper, but you still pay for food and decorations. Ask venues for a quote.

Typical food is bite-sized and savoury: sandwiches, tortilla, croquetas, empanadillas, pizza slices, crisps and nuggets, with soft drinks and juice. The centrepiece is the birthday cake (tarta) with candles and the "Cumpleaños feliz" song. Home parties often add a piñata filled with sweets and small toys. Many play centres have a fixed snack menu.

Party bags are widely expected from the host. Each guest gets one when leaving. It is called a bolsa de chuches, bolsa de cumple or detalle. It holds sweets (chuches), small toys, stickers, a balloon or a small craft item. Some families now give non-food items, fruit or a book instead.

Allergies

Tell the host about any allergy or intolerance when you confirm, usually by WhatsApp. Say clearly how severe it is, because hosts may be less used to strict avoidance. If you are the host, ask the venue about allergens and alternatives when you book. Venues must give information on the 14 main allergens. At a home party, bring a safe snack or cake for your child, and carry any medication.

Do parents stay?

Parents of children up to about age 5 or 6 normally stay. At play centres and restaurants they often have a coffee and chat. From about age 6 to 7, drop-off becomes common, especially when staff supervise. Come back at the agreed end time. Older children may be dropped at the door.

The timeline, checklist and FAQ below cover the steps in order.

Timeline and deadlines

• Check school rules before handing out paper invitations in class: before you hand out any cards; some schools only allow them if the whole class is invited

Children's birthday party checklist for host and guest

Children's birthday party checklist

• Send or answer the invitation 1 to 3 weeks before the party, by WhatsApp message or a printed card handed over at pick-up.

• Reply to "confirmar asistencia" a few days before the party, so the host can give the venue a headcount and food order.

• Pack a safe snack or cake and any medication if your child has an allergy and the party is at home.

• Buy a wrapped gift costing 10 to 20 euros, such as a toy, a game, a book or a craft kit.

• Ask the class parents' group whether families are pooling money or sharing a gift list, to avoid duplicates.

• Choose a venue: play centre (parque de bolas), party room, fast-food restaurant, community room (local de comunidad), park or home.

• Request quotes and budget about 10 to 20 euros per child for a play centre package with snacks, drinks, cake and an entertainer.

• Book the venue 3 to 6 weeks ahead, or at least 1 to 2 months ahead for busy weekends, spring or before Christmas, and pay the deposit.

• Order a birthday cake (tarta) with candles, and a piñata if you are hosting at home.

• Prepare one party bag (bolsa de chuches or detalle) per guest, with sweets, stickers or a small toy, to hand out as they leave.

• Plan for two to three hours, usually starting at 17:00 or 18:00 and finishing before 20:00 or 21:00, or 12:00 to 14:00 at weekends.