Greetings, kisses and small talk at work

Key rules

• First meeting: Offer a handshake first, and follow the other person's lead if they go for besos.
• Daily greeting: Greet colleagues when you arrive and say goodbye when you leave, or a general hello to the room in a big office.
• Small talk: Family, food and football are safe; politics, religion and complaints about pay or your boss are not.
• Your limits: Unwanted touching or comments are never acceptable, and companies must have a protocol against harassment.

Greet everyone, every day

Say hello when you arrive and goodbye when you leave. This is expected, especially in small and mid-sized offices. Skipping greetings can come across as cold or rude.

• On arrival: "Buenos días" or "Hola, buenas".
• On leaving: "Hasta luego", "Hasta mañana", "Que tengáis buen día", or "Buen fin de semana" on a Friday.

In a large open-plan office, one general greeting to the room is enough. You do not need to go desk by desk after the first day.

Dos besos or a handshake?

At a first meeting, a handshake is the safe choice. This is especially true with clients, senior managers and formal sectors. Many people simply follow the other person's lead.

Dos besos means one kiss on each cheek, right cheek first. In practice it is a light cheek touch, often with no real kiss. Here is who uses it:

• Women with women, and women with men: common in informal, friendly settings, and among younger staff.
• Two men: usually a handshake, or a hug if they are close friends.
• After the first meeting: colleagues often move on to besos.

Besos are more common in the south and in smaller firms. Since COVID, handshakes and a plain hello have become more common, and some people no longer use besos at work. If you are unsure, offer your hand or just say hello, and let the other person set the style.

Small talk that works

Colleagues often ask personal questions early on. That is friendly, not nosy. Answer simply and ask something back.

Safe and welcome topics:

• Food, restaurants and recipes
• Family and children
• Football and other sport
• Holidays, travel and weekend plans
• Local festivals and the weather
• Your own country and your impressions of Spain

Chatting before getting to business is normal, so do not rush it.

Topics to handle with care

Avoid or tread carefully with regional politics (the Catalan and Basque questions), the monarchy, Franco and the Civil War, party politics, bullfighting and religion. Football banter between rival clubs is fine, but hostility is not. Complaining about your salary or your boss is risky, even among friendly colleagues.

Closeness and touch

Spaniards often stand closer than northern Europeans. A pat on the arm or shoulder and steady eye contact are normal between colleagues who know each other. Voices can be loud, and interrupting usually shows interest.

You still set your own limits. Unwanted touching, hugging or comments are not acceptable. Sexual harassment is prohibited by law, and companies must have a protocol against it. If something makes you uncomfortable, ask your HR contact about that protocol.

The checklist, warnings and questions below cover your first week in more detail.

First-week etiquette checklist for a Spanish workplace

First-week etiquette

• Greet each person in your team one by one: a handshake on first meeting, or two kisses (one on each cheek) between women and between a man and a woman where colleagues do it.

• Say "buenos días" when you arrive and "hasta luego" when you leave.

• Use first names and tú (the informal "you") with colleagues, and keep usted (the formal "you") for clients and senior people until they invite you to use tú.

• Dress neat and smart-casual on day one, then match what your colleagues wear, with lighter clothes in summer.

• Join the coffee break, and say yes if someone invites you to lunch.

• Chat about family, food and weekends before turning to business.

• Arrive on time for meetings, even if social events start more flexibly.

• Stay calm when people interrupt you: in Spain it shows interest, not rudeness.

• Learn a few basic Spanish phrases, and if you make a mistake, apologise quickly and offer to buy a coffee.

• Ask your manager about your working hours and whether there is a summer intensive schedule.

What to watch out for

• Touchy political and historical topics: Talking about regional politics (the Catalan and Basque questions), the monarchy, Franco and the Civil War, or party politics can cause real offence. Stay with safe topics such as food, travel, family and football, and let colleagues raise politics first.

• Religion and bullfighting: Religion and bullfighting divide opinion and can make colleagues uncomfortable. Change the subject to weekend plans or local festivals.

• Football rivalry that turns hostile: Friendly banter about rival clubs is fine, but hostility is not and can sour a relationship. Tease lightly, laugh at yourself too, and drop the subject if the mood changes.

• Complaining about pay or your boss: Complaining about salaries or your boss is risky and can easily get back to the people involved. Keep complaints for friends outside work, and raise real concerns directly with your manager or HR.

Frequently asked questions

Do I have to greet everyone in a big open-plan office?

No, in a large open-plan office a general greeting to the room is enough. In a small or mid-sized office, greet each person you meet.

Which colleagues will kiss me on the cheek and which will shake hands?

Women with women, and women with men, often use dos besos in informal settings, while two men usually shake hands. Hugs are for men who are close friends. Besos are more common in the south, in smaller firms and among younger staff, and since COVID more people just say hello.

Is it rude if colleagues ask me personal questions early on?

No, personal questions early on are usually friendly rather than intrusive. Colleagues often ask about your family, your country and what you think of Spain. You can answer briefly and ask the same back.

What should I do if a colleague's touch or comment makes me uncomfortable?

Say so clearly, because unwanted touching, hugging or comments are not acceptable at work. A pat on the arm is normal among colleagues who know each other, but harassment is prohibited by law. Companies must have a protocol against it, so ask HR for it.